So This is Waking Up

Head high but eyelids heavy 

Slow and sluggish and somewhat unsteady 

All alarms gone off already 

But the outside world is still dark 

Rent reveries I cannot recall 

Illusions lost upon leaving the lull 

Dynamics depressed to default 

So this is waking up 

A period of pause prolonged 

With will to stay withdrawn 

Clinging and clutching the calm 

As slowly it slips away 

A silence severed by sigh 

The trance trumped by time 

Reluctantly rising upright 

The moment it all begins 

Sinews strained and stretched 

Every fiber far from refreshed 

Exhaustion enacts its effect 

But regardless I must go 

Lethargy’s not lessened by laying 

Staleness not stymied by staying 

War is not won in waiting 

It’s time to be on my way

different dawn

it’s pacing the halls

while staring at the floor.

it’s a couple stains,

of pain no more.

it’s a passing glance,

a hesitant smile.

we’re here for a moment

or here for a while.

it’s minutes and hours

that are only seconds,

timeless days, and

punctuated check-ins.

it’s knocks on doors—

interrupted sleep—

interrupted lives

of souls to keep.

it’s unfamiliar rules

and surrendered rights.

for little victories

over familiar fights.

it’s giving in

to yet march on,

abandoning shame

for a different dawn.